A Quick Monologue About Privilege

For the past month or so I’ve been getting PMs from a guy who thinks I’m a girl he grew up with. He asked if my mom’s name was Tammy, because if so we definitely know each other and should get back in touch. My mom’s name is not Tammy, so I didn’t even plan on responding. Not long after that message I get another, asking why I’m ignoring him, why can’t I just talk to him. It quickly turned into what a bitch I am, so I blocked him and carried on with my existence. I have no interest in arguing with some guy and his bruised ego just because I won’t talk to him. Then, he moves to my business page to tell me I’m rude as fuck, and that my business is failing because I don’t talk to nice people.
To some of you this sounds like some crazy story– to a lot of others, it’s a consistentcy. Another guy demanding his existence is acknowledged by you, another guy flying off the handle because you chose not to react, another guy thinking it’s perfectly acceptable to seek out a stranger and start calling her a bitch.
But we don’t talk about it. Because it’s normal. It’s typical. Why is this kind of behavior normalized? Why is it okay to start lashing out when you dont get what you want?
In this setting, I’m perfectly safe to ignore and block this guy as I choose. In person, this guy would be yelling in my face and following me to my car. Yeah, hopefully he’s just an asshole with the powers of a keyboard, but they aren’t always.
So, why the really long rant. Because this is not okay. It’s one scenario that happens over and over, online and in person, that we don’t really talk about. Yes, I could have immediately replied and said nope wrong person, but I shouldn’t have to just to cross my fingers that I’m not going to get insulted today. And if I told this guy that this behavior is not acceptable in any format then it would be white noise, but I’m saying it here for next time. Because there will be a next time. And myself or one of you reading this will remember that your passive reaction does not warrant a violent one.


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